all I want is you (for Kate)

[duerespectguv]

Magnus found and returned to Will made for a good day and now two days later, it seems everything's back to some semblance of normal. There's still the bit about Kate bolting on him the morning Magnus disappeared but Declan's learned the best way to get Kate to talk is just to wait her out and she'll come around eventually; pressuring her doesn't seem to do any good.

He's settled in with a book, this one on boat-building of all crazy things and wonders if it's really true that they can't get off the island. He's seen a few boats, fishing boats, and there's that pirate ship but nothing like a cruise liner or a battleship and if they had one of those, maybe they could get home. Magnus and Will might not want to go home but Declan does because Declan can't stand feeling useless. This island makes him useless.

When he hears the door crack to his hut, he doesn't get up. It's Kate, if anyone, because Magnus and Will would knock and Tesla would have already announced himself by now.

"Bedroom," he calls out, not that she'll need the direction.

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[girlsolo.livejournal.com]

Everything's back to normal, no weird powers, no one dead that she knows of...normal. Except that it's not normal at all and they're still stuck here and they haven't fixed anything, and Kate's really not okay with the fact the island just changes people sometimes. What if it doesn't change them back? Not that Auggie having special sight is a bad thing, but what if Magnus couldn't get control of her teleporting or little Coraline could never talk again or...

Or Declan turned into someone he wasn't and then what? How would she ever get out of here then?

So no, Kate's not okay. She's not remotely okay but she's doing a good enough job lying to everyone else about it and herself that she thinks she can pull off a night with Declan to stop feeling freaked out without telling him that's what she's doing?

She has all of her things with her, not that she needs too many or that she doesn't have some of her stuff stashed here anyway (which they don't talk about), and she slips into sleep shorts and a tank before going into the bedroom.

"Can I stay?" she asks, not saying hi or getting on the bed, just sort of hovering by the door until he gives her permission. That's probably a sure sign she's not okay, now that she thinks about it, but whatever. She can pass it off as being polite since she took off on him the other day.

[duerespectguv]

While he half expects Kate to show up unannounced, Declan doesn't expect her to ask if she can stay. It's a little vulnerable, which he doesn't expect of Kate, but she's a lot different than she's always seemed on the surface. He nods quickly and motions toward the bed.

"Always," he promises. "You don't have to ask."

[girlsolo.livejournal.com]

Kate's eyes widen and soften at that and her hands fist open and closed at her sides once before she decides to go. He cares about her, way too much, and she doesn't want to lose it or abuse it.

"Don't say 'always'," she says quietly, most of her lies stripped away by the simple truth that he wants her here. She slips into his bed and curls scared-close before she loses the will she's had to work up to let herself have what she needs. "Nothing's 'always,' especially not on this fucking island."

[duerespectguv]

Declan tugs her close and just holds her for a moment, hand drifting through her hair. She's scared and bad and it's just not like Kate to show a weakness. This island's hard on all of them, but maybe hardest on her.

"Want to talk about it?"

[girlsolo.livejournal.com]

He's warm and steady and just like it did a few mornings ago, her fight or flight reflex kicks hard. She stiffens, fighting herself instead of him, because she's not dumb and her best friend's a shrink. She's heard enough psychobabble to know if she's reacting this bad, she needs something to bring her off the ledge, her shrink-BFF is in bed with their boss right now, Aidan doesn't even sound appealing, and Tesla sounds like an all-expense paid trip to the IPD jail for aggravated assault.

Her breathing is heavy and forced, muscles so tense they could snap, but she stays and lets Declan be the something. As soon as she makes the decision to stay, the fight goes out of her and she rests her head on his shoulder, breathes, and focuses on the stroke of his hand through her hair.

"Nothing much to talk about. The island turned one of my best friends halfway into someone she hates, Sam's an idiot, Coraline couldn't talk for three days, Will was turning into a Cillobar the last time I saw him at home, Walter was the great righter of wrongs and I turned into flipping Catwoman and hurt my friends. There. Done."

[duerespectguv]

"Last time I saw you, you helped me hijack an ICBM and send it flying at Carentan. You conned the mercenaries, you did a hell of a lot better than Will did at finding Magnus and nobody holds the suit against you," Declan says, patiently listing out what she'd thrown at him.

"That said, I'm surprised you haven't cracked before now, love. What do you need?"

[girlsolo.livejournal.com]

"To go home and hijack an ICBM with you," she says when she gets control of her emotions again. Remember the days when you used to have the world's best Pokerface, Freelander?

Kate sighs, a short, aggravated huff and her nails scratch lightly over his skin. "Just don't go curtain-shopping with Tesla on me and I'll be fine." Just be you, Declan. Please.

[duerespectguv]

"No danger of that. Tesla's no friend of mine, just a necessary evil," Declan says, laughing lightly to break the tension. He keeps her close, worried, because Kate's not normally like this and he guesses she's at the end of her rope. He's not there yet.

"I'm no shrink like Zimmerman so I don't know what to say. All I can do is be here and keep you safe until you make it through what's bothering you."

[girlsolo.livejournal.com]

Screwing up her face, Kate punches him lightly in the shoulder. "You sound like bad daytime tv. Quit it."

With a sigh, she pulls herself off him and sits up at the headboard with her arms around her knees and her chin resting on them. "I don't know how to do this. Magnus and Will don't need me, except to babysit their sloth or Magnus's new proteges. No one knows anything so all the recon in the world doesn't help. I've spent my entire life learning how to survive in a world where greed rules everything and no one needs anything here." She frowns, because that shouldn't be a bad thing, and it's not, really. Just... "I just...never let myself get attached to anyone or anything and you guys all changed that and now it's all just gone. And what isn't gone, this island could take away tomorrow."

[duerespectguv]

"We're still the same people even if the Sanctuary's not here," Declan points out but it falls flat. She's right, that the island can take things away in the blink of an eye. He doesn't like to think about. That if he can help it.

"We just have to do what we can with what we're given, trite as that sounds."

[girlsolo.livejournal.com]

"Now you sound like a Quaker or something." Kate scowls. She shouldn't have come here. She should've crawled into a bottle or bed with someone she didn't give a fuck about. She should be letting go, not holding on tighter.

"Forget it, Declan. Just forget I said anything. There's nothing anyone can do anyway. I'll be fine. I always am."

[duerespectguv]

"Part of being your friend and caring about you is letting me carry some of this for you," Declan says softly, tugging at her to pull her close again. "Even if I don't exactly know what to say or do to make it easier. Let me try, Kate?"

Hopefully it won't spook her but if it does, he can just try again.

[girlsolo.livejournal.com]

"I can't." There's no kicking or biting or screaming or fleeing, just a quiet denial. "Declan, I just can't."

She can't let him help, she can't let him carry any of it, she has to learn to deal with this on her own, because she's the only person who will always be wherever she is. If she holds on too tight, it's a sure bet, he'll be gone tomorrow.

"If you want to help me, distract me. Make me forget for awhile." She'll be better after. She always is. Sometimes the only thing to do with the hour of the wolf is howl your way through it.

[duerespectguv]

Declan only hesitates for a split second before covering her mouth with his in a kiss that is no holds barred and leaves nothing to the imagination. She wants to forget and this is the best weapon he has in his arsenal for that. Besides, he'd be lying to himself (again) if he says he doesn't want her and doesn't want this and Declan thinks Kate's earned some honesty.

If she kicks his ass for taking a liberty, he'll deal with it accordingly but he suspects she wants it as much as he does.

[girlsolo.livejournal.com]

When he kisses her, it's as decisive as every action she's ever seen him take in a fight, and it stuns Kate breathless. Ask and you shall receive, hasn't ever been something Kate believed in, but when it comes to Declan, it's apparently true. Recovery comes quick and then she's kissing back with a complete lack of restraint and only breaking the seal of their mouths to pull her shirt over her head.

"Yes." He's the guy who needs to hear her say yes, needs to know it's all okay. "Please," she adds at a whisper, afraid if she says it too loud it'll scare him away.

[duerespectguv]

"Yes," he murmurs back, catching her mouth in another kiss and tugging at her lower lip with his teeth. Fast and hard so he can help her forget, that's the way this has to be. If he slows down and takes what he wants, they'll both end up in a bigger mess than they're already in.

Declan runs his hands over her bare back and down to her hips to tug her over to straddle him.

[girlsolo.livejournal.com]

Declan tugs and Kate goes, knees framing his hips, already spread wide for him before he's touched her, before he's even gotten her out of her shorts. This is nothing like Aidan, strength matched to strength, pushing each other to and past any limits and Kate knows it. This is her giving up power to someone who knows her well enough to use it.

Her heart's racing, pupils dilating so fast she can't focus, the shivers over her skin are more than pleasure. She whimpers into his kisses and offers it up. "Anything. Just help me forget."

[duerespectguv]

"No worries about that," Declan promises, sliding his hands up to cup her breasts. It's a little more frantic than he'd normally be, especially for a first time, but more than anything it's about what Kate needs and not what Declan wants.

"How do you like it, then? Fast, hard, slow, gentle, teasing, hmm? What's going to make you forget the easiest?"

[girlsolo.livejournal.com]

Kate arches forward, pressing into his hands, gaze locked onto his. He knows what she needs. "Not slow, not now." Her voice is raw with her needs, but he has needs too and Kate's had a glimpse of them. He wants to be caring and kind and when she's better, maybe she'll let him. "Not gentle."

Fast, hard, overwhelming is easier but...she summons up something like a smile for him. "I trust you, Declan. Anything, as long as I don't have time to think."

[duerespectguv]

"Blow me, then," Declan says, threading his hands in her hair and tugging lightly. It's a little more pushy than he'd normally be but she needs it and he's happy to give it to her.

[girlsolo.livejournal.com]

"Gods yeah."

As right as she's been in days now, Kate lifts off his legs to tug off her shorts and help him out of his. She's quick about it, and he helps, but it still feels like too long before she's sliding down between his thighs, hands curled around them, to press her lips to the base of his shaft and tilt her chin up to find his gaze.

"This good, babe, or do you want me on my knees or back?" She'll give him anything, anything, and she really hopes he gets how much she wants him to put her where he wants her.

[duerespectguv]

"That's fine," Declan promises, tangling a hand in her hair and tugging lightly. It's not his usual, to want it like this, but it's what she needs and he needs to make her feel good and forget for a little while.

"Don't let me come, Kate. I'll tell you when to stop."

[girlsolo.livejournal.com]

No sense wasting words when actions speak louder, Kate rubs her cheek against the inside of his thigh, then blinks a single nod. This isn't anything like Aidan either, not furious raging heat but the slow, tight knot of it in her belly and Kate being as good to him as she knows how.

Eyes closed, lips open, breathing him and wetting his whole length with her tongue, Kate blocks out any thought, any fear, any anything with a focus on him. Making him feel good. She takes her time about it, but finally curls her fingers around the back of his thighs, relaxes her jaw and swallows him down all the way to the root.

[duerespectguv]

Easier said than done, not coming, and Declan lets out a low groan before getting a grip on himself. It's been a while for him, at least, and he cares enough about her that the emotions simply add heat to the fire.

He keeps his hand tangled in her hair and tips his head back, enjoying himself and her. "That's good, Katie. Almost a little too good."

[girlsolo.livejournal.com]

Katie. That's almost too good too, almost too much acceptance, affection, and intimacy. Almost. But the bitter-salt of him on her tongue instead of latex is good, both the taste and the trust that it's safe. She scrapes her fingernails lightly along the back of his thighs, trying to tell him it's good for her too, before she loops her fingers around him to keep him from coming like he asked.

Her thighs are slick from taking him like this, slicker the faster she bobs over him, and her breasts swing and rub against the rough spread beneath him. It's enough of a tease to make her work to focus, and she sucks that much harder, whimpering, even moaning softly around his cock.